I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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