I wish I could teleport
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize