If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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