drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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