If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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