Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize