***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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