Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
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I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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