If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize