I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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