I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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