OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize