I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize