And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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