So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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