not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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