my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize