I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
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That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
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I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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