Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
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Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
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i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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