She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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