garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize