Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
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She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Just puked most of my soul out..
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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