Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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