i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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