we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Your penis caused this!
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