What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
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Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
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We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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