i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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