I'm so fucking centered right now
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
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