I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize