the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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