New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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