apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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