Yo dont text me then not text me
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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