let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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