it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
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I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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