idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
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The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
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I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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