I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize