is your mom at the bar?
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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