Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
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It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
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Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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