Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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