either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize