My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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