remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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