It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
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We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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