apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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