I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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