I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize