I think my vagina is haunted
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize