Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize