so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
How external is "for external use only"?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize